Why It Always Seems Easy For Others But Not For You
Recently, someone wrote to me about his business. The gist of the message was: it seems everyone is so good at starting business, but I’m terrible at it and I don’t think I can be helped.
Woah.
The response to what others do is telling. You might not be able to do X in a world class way. But if you participate it, you need to learn how to fail in a world class manner too. In The Matrix, Neo is introduced to “The Fall”: Morpheus leaps with ease from one building to another. Neo tries it for the first time, and fails royally. Because he was on the path to something far greater than the present limits of himself.
Every individual I coach in my Apex Coaching program (for Life or Business) often wants to maximize results in their life and business.
The obstacles to their success in these areas come from places where they are untested, and many are inner limitations. They include:
- dealing with unreasonable people or requests (actually it’s an issue with their frame of reference in their model of the world);
- confronting ‘procrastination’ (actually it isn’t really procrastination but motivation misapplied);
- chasing the wrong goals;
- being severely disappointed at someone or something in life;
- dealing with conflicting inner decisions;
- helplessness, worthlessness and hopelessness (often attributed to some form of unaddressed past trauma);
- mistaken beliefs that cause misdirection
My job is to initiate inner activation to find, unlock and unleash their hidden greatness so they produce results on the outside.
When you are not challenged, you cannot find greatness. Many of my clients are in transition from one stage of greatness to another. It is a struggle because they are confronted with things they have never encountered before. Sometimes, the unnerving voice says “but this thing I struggle with is so easy for everyone else”.
It’s easy to think we are not good enough and that it comes naturally for others. I’ve had that helpless voice too! Here’s a list of the things I felt others naturally did well but I had struggled with (but got better at):
- public speaking
- managing details
- being patient
- self-motivation
- listening
- writing
- self-assurance
- self-care
- being supported and helped
- a bad temper
- recovering from a disappointment
- appreciating what I have
- being encouraging
The fact is, what you do well is never the place where you will be met with seemingly insurmountable challenges. And often, the root cause of these are easier to unravel than you think.
When you are given a challenge during times, there are several things that keep them striving.
- Past success. If you have done it before you can do it again. You need to master the tools that enable you to naturally lean into that state and amplify it in your mind, body and soul.
- Confront, acknowledge and choose to remove impediments. If you are honest about your limitations, confront them, accept them and learn to remove them. I’ve used (and invented) some 40 different tools to help release such inner limitations.
- Someone has done it before. Model of awesomeness surround us and we need only know how to model them utilizing the appropriate framework and mindsets to have a clear and detailed operational map.
- Double down on Strengths. Your strengths are powerful. Your weaknesses even more informative. If you knew that many of your weaknesses are due to your strengths being misused, abused or overplayed, you’ll come to have a new found respect for yourself. As a speaker and coach, I’m still learning speaking and coaching even though I have 27 years of experience. In the digital age, the new generation will catch up with you in 5 to 7 years not because of anything else, but that you slowed down.
- A vision of their desired and meaningful future. Without a clear vision of your future, any effort you implement is likely to be quite meaningless.
If you are being challenged, don’t ignore it. Embrace it, and choose to unlock great results by activating the inner greatness within.